Then does he look back for a sign,
or forward for a signpost?
Many have looked forward to a sign,
and missed the post.
C.S. Lewis says the signs only come,
in the beginning.
As one matures in his growth,
the signs spread out,
and then disappear.
By the time they are gone,
you fail to notice anymore.
The signs then are like fig tree buds,
in spring, they are a sign of the time,
but they are not the end time,
or the final fruits.
The final chapter of C.S. Lewis, Surprised by Joy.
Thus they spoke in anger,
or was it in frustration,
the devils who had rebelled,
in the beginning.
They still maintained their, knowledge
sure knowledge, they had been there,
in the beginning, until being cast out.
This rebellion was it worth the cost, to be paid?
it cost them their brightness and their shared glory.
Brightness can only be maintained,
in nearness to the Father,
and his reflected light.
The second creations,
fell not less, from lack of knowledge,
but from experience and freedom of the will.
They then learn to turn back toward the Father,
They then resubmit their will to the Father,
and then receive redemption from the Son.
As I, one of the second creations will I learn,
to resubmit my will to the Father, and receive redemption?
I want to remain in his presence and then bask in his warmth.
Thus sharing and receiving his Glory as I submit
to him, and become like him, a knew.
See Paradise Lost Book, Book III, John Milton
For what then of the devils?
Do they not then recognize him,
as the Son of God.
They then have a sure knowledge of his Mission
and of his works.
What then does this knowledge then gain them.
What knowledge and additional incite,
do then they gain,
from experience.
They are so wrapped up in hate,
and envy, and in strife.
So jealous of him, were they, then.
This then to be ejected from the Father’s presence,
for a refusal to submit,
to submit their will to the will of the Father.
Lucifer claimed to know, not, a time when he was not.
When he was not sovereign over his own spirit and will.
His refusal to submit cost him so much,
though he retained his knowledge
and early experiences.
He began to lose his reflected light,
the reflected light of God the Father,
as the moon loses its light as she moves further away from the Sun.
I desire not to lose my reflected light,
so I move closer to the Father and feel his warmth
and reflected light as I learn to submit my will,
to the will of the Father.
What does he then learn,
on this, the morning after?
This thing he now comes,
to understand, a knew,
this, then, this time.
Gethsemane had always been plan A,
not a contingency, not plan B,
but plan A.
He and the Father had studied it,
and discussed it, and approved it.
This the plan then,
how to rescue the second,
creations.
The first had rebelled,
had been cast out,
before their bodies,
they had received.
Their choice than to follow,
Lucifer, The Son of the Morning.
The Heavens mourned their loss,
at his rebellion.
To know a thing,
is not to understand a thing.
This then to know,
This thing he must now, experience,
to better understand,
to better become their advocate,
with the Father.
This then new experience,
is like, the experience,
of new Fatherhood.
One can study and understand,
the process, but to receive, then a child,
and then to raise a child,
this, then offers a new level, of understanding.
What then does he now, understand,
on the morning after, Gethsemane.
The Father,
had separated himself, not
than ever, from the Son.
This, then new experience,
This, then new death,
this we label, Spiritual Death.
Spiritual Death,
requires separation,
from the Father.
The Son had never sinned.
had never chosen, his ways,
over his Father's ways.
Or to say again,
the Father's ways were always,
his ways.
These ways, then,
one and the same,
were they, always.
The Father and Son,
always, of one mind,
and one soul.
How then does the Father,
separate himself,
from the Son?
What corner of the Universe,
can he then go to,
to then be apart,
and no longer be, one soul,
with the Son.
That the Son may now experience,
Spiritual Death?
To better advocate for,
their new Creations.
To redeem now, their new,
Creations.
This thing, then he learned,
then, here this day.
The pain of separation,
of guilt and shame.
Freedom, or free will,
was always going to require,
The possibility of the choice,
other than the Fathers choice,
This then we label,
the Fathers will.
With these choices, by the new creation,
they would then learn to be more,
like the Father and the Son.
This then to learn to rejoice,
to regret the consequences of,
these new choices.
Turning back towards the Father,
they would then, learn,
to resubmit their will,
to the Fathers will,
their ways becoming, aknew,
the Father's ways, again.
This then always learning,
that the Father's choices would then become,
their choices, the remainder of the Eternities.
The Son now understanding their choice,
from his experiences, on Earth, and in the Garden.
This then new knowledge and experience,
and then to take upon himself,
the full price, and penalty of sin,
or separation from God The Father.
Then becoming their, advocate with the Father.
Born July 6, 1965
Logan Cache County
Utah
Born May 5, 1960
Brigham City Box
Elder County Utah
January 6, 1990
Logan City, Cache
County Utah
Logan L.D.S Temple
It began with a gentle nibbling on her ear.
This is the first line of a poem I wrote several years ago
for my communications class at Brigham Young University – Idaho. It is about
the first time I made love to my wife. It was on our second day of marriage;
she asked me to help her make a baby.
The first day had been a long a tiring day. Bonnie had to plan and
prepare her own wedding reception. After
the wedding, we cleaned up the church cultural hall, so that first night
together had been a pajama night. She will forever remain the only woman to
make that request.
I ask myself this question at work. What is a marriage if it is not about
companionship and not about sex? Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy sex as much as the
next man and the desire to participate in it has never left me, but my wife
lost the desire for sex, decades ago. I don’t know if it is because of early
menopause brought on by the hysterectomy, the way I treated her early in our
marriage, or just the physical fact that I am too fat for sex to be comfortable
for me. The fact remains that I have remained forever attracted to her and have
a desire to bless her life in whatever relationship I can maintain between us. Sometimes,
this can be difficult because, after 30 minutes with her, I need to find
something else to capture my attention as our interests are so divergent.
A couple of years ago, I wrote an essay, that on the surface,
seemed to say my wife was not my best friend but that my sister was my best
friend. My wife and I share a best
friend. It is my younger sister Debra. Years ago, my wife recommended that if I
wanted to see a movie or go do something socially that I should take my sister.
I have more fun on a date with my sister than I do with my wife. My wife knows
there is no physical attraction with my sister; we have similar interests and
enjoy doing the same things. There is no fear that I will begin an affair with
my sister. Neither my sister nor I
desire that sort of relationship; we just enjoy doing the same things socially.
Many times, when we were first married, I would take Debra and her husband on
double dates so I would have someone to talk to during dinner.
But if you read between the lines of that essay, you see
that Bonnie is my best friend, not because we have similar interests or because
we enjoy doing the same things. Bonnie
has dedicated herself to providing me with a good life, a clean home, and two
children. For two decades, she was always home when I arrived home. Bonnie knew
I hated coming home to an empty house. On those rare occasions when she could
not be home, she would send me on an errand or ask me to wait for her at
someone’s home until she could be home with me.
Bonnie may have only done this on a dozen occasions in those twenty
years.
I remember the story of the little boy who, on coming home,
runs into the house to find his mother.
Once he has located her, he can go outside to play or start his chores.
That is the way I felt about coming home.
I would look for my wife. I
needed to know where she was because she is the base I built my life upon.
When she discovered I was infertile, we attended some
adoption classes at L.D.S. Social Services. When that did not work out, she
hatched a play with her younger sister to provide us with a child. Without
Bonnie, I would not have received a child; I may never have become a father
without Bonnie and Nancy.
I always wanted to be a father and husband. In my teens, I
began a study of early L.D.S. Church history. I was reading the 7-volume
history of Joseph Smith and his restoration of the Church. It is the one edited
by B.H. Roberts. I would read and journal about my experience every night. My
ninth-grade teacher was teaching me to write simple one-page essays. I would write these essays and write letters
to my future wife and children.
My mom taught me from an early age about
the castle on the hill in the center of town. It was a temple, built by my
grandfathers, where she had knelt at an altar and promised to be my mom for all
eternity. She said because of that
promise; we would be a family for all eternity.
I wanted to find a woman who would make these same promises
with me at the same temple alters.
I would write and journal about what this woman would be
like, and I questioned how I would find her and know her when I met her.
In my Church, we are asked not to date or court women until
we turn 16; even then, we are asked to court in groups. This often includes
dances and combined activities with the young women in the Ward. The first girl
I dated one on one with was Linda Bullard. We had been friends when she was
younger and lived next to my grandma Bassett. I lost track of her when she
moved away at about ten. We met again when she was 14. This was at my bishop's
house, a friend of her foster parents. She invited me to their home for
Thanksgiving. This never worked out because she was too young to court.
The next girl I courted, I met on a Logan High Orchestra
trip. We attended a competition in San Diego, California. She made me lunch in her motel room. I fell asleep afterward while watching
television. This is not a great way to begin a courtship. I was attracted to several of the orchestra
girls, but none of them developed into anything more than admiration from afar.
When I was serving as Mission Recorder in the Mission Office,
I learned that Terri Sue Allen was going on a mission to Austria. She was a
year older than me in High School. I could start courting her after our
missions. She was one of the girls I was attracted to in High School. I visited
her several time on Sunday evening, and I even took her on a few dates, but she
was not interested in anything more. This infatuation lasted several years. After
I gave up on starting this relationship, I discovered Bonnie.
When I was 23, my roommate challenged me to get married next
year. I was not dating anyone at the time. He said I could set a goal and then
pray about it. This I decided to do.
I noticed a young lady in our young adult ward who had a
small child. She was a bit of a wild child seeking to change her life. Her name
was Cindy. I am not sure she was a baptized member of the Ward. Once, she came
dressed in a dog collar when we went out. One time we went to a local bar to
listen to a band. The band was led by a
friend from high school, Aaron Baugh. It
may seem weird to go to a bar and not drink just to listen to a band, but that
is what we did. Thankfully I realized this relationship was not the kind of
relationship I needed to get married in the temple.
I was introduced to another young lady by a member of our
young adult ward. Ginger Bright and I
went out a few times; she may have been my first steady girlfriend. She asked
me to stop dating her because she had been raped and could never make anyone a
good wife. I was grateful that she broke things off. The thought of waking up every morning and
seeing her in bed was not pleasant.
One day my date began bugging me about a girl from his work.
He said she was a return missionary and needed a good boyfriend. I was not interested
in asking her out. I have learned from experience that the only way I could get
him to leave me alone was to ask her out at least once. He made it seem like he
had talked to her, and she wanted to go out with me.
I was working part-time at a Television Repair shop. I had dropped out of college because my
grades were terrible. One day she brought her television in for repair. She
arrived in her sisters' car with her mom and her sisters' children. I thought they looked like the Beverly
Hillbillies. I called her up one day at work.
Her mom answered the phone, and I asked to speak with Bonnie. No, the television was not repaired but would
she go swimming with me that weekend.
The Young adult ward had an activity at a Hot Springs in Preston, Idaho. I think she went out with me to stop Dad from
bugging her at work about his return missionary son. The date went well, and
she did look good in a bathing suit. She agreed to a second date. I think it was to the movies. Our third date
was the Herzog family reunion. I needed to introduce her to my family
early. If she did not like my family, this
relationship would go nowhere. She loved my family, and they loved her. Within
six months, we were married and sealed in the temple. Only later did I learn
that she knew my older brother and swore she would never marry one of my
fathers' sons.
I enjoy family history and love to learn about my
grandfathers and grandmothers. I have a program on my cell phone that lets me
see all of their histories for at least seven generations. I have read many of
their life histories. It is an example of their relationship that has
strengthened Bonnie and my relationship.
Thurston Larson was one of the ancestors I
love to learn about. He immigrated from
Norway to a community in Iowa near Nauvoo; it was there that his family joined
the Mormon church. He was part of the group forced to leave Nauvoo and
immigrate west as part of the Mormon migration. He was part of the Mormon
Battalion and served in the Mexican American War. He married a young lady from
England. She left him for another man leaving him with several children. Later
in life, they remarried in the Logan Temple. He partly did this so he could
leave her with his war pension. Sometimes love means taking care of someone
even when they have wronged you. He must have loved her.
This is my grandmother Lauretta West
Byington. My mom told me her story from when I was a little boy. She died while
in child delivery. She left several children for my grandfather to raise as a
single father in the depression. She could have had an operation to deliver the
child, but she would die. She decided to take this last child to Heaven to
raise herself. She could not leave her husband with one more child to support
with little or no resources.
Her daughter Sarah Elnora (Nora) Herzog raised her last
child. Chancy came with her when she married my grandfather Leo Herzog.
These memories of my ancestors and their relationships have sustained
my desire to build a relationship with my wife. When life becomes challenging
and unbearable, I think of them, and their sacrifices give me the strength to
try one more time.
I do love my wife and my children. I want them forever. Without my wife and our temple covenants, I also
know I cannot with my mother and father and our extended family. I will devote the remainder of my life to
blessing Bonnie's life so that she will choose me again as her eternal
companion when we wake on the morning of the resurrection.
I have walked the Battlefields of Vicksburg MS. Whether those battles be from civil war days or the days of my youth.
In the fall of 1985, I lived briefly in Vicksburg MS. I was serving as a missionary for The Church
of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. During the weeks I would walk the streets
knocking on doors and speaking to people.
Searching for those who were searching for Christ. Most of the time my search failed. Not many people were searching for
Christ. Even though their lives were
largely unfulfilled they where not dissatisfied enough to seek a change.
On the weekends or on Preparation Day, I would drive the
single-lane road that covered the Vicksburg Battlefield Park. Men battled there
for lives that were largely unsatisfying and unfulfilled. In those times the Generals thought nothing
of losing 50,000 American lives in one day. These men may have come from both Boston
and Memphis, yet still, they were American lives.
At the close of my mission, I again walked the Battlefields
of Vicksburg, this time with my mom. I
had asked her to come and bring me home at the end of my mission. My Mom and I had
battled for two decades to create a relationship that was fulfilled and
satisfying. As I look back now as an
old man, I think we essentially won that battle.
And again, today I see men and women, American’s, battling
in the streets for their largely unsatisfying lives. We still waste far too many
American lives. We continue to battle for the unsatisfying, the things that
will never feed our bodies and support our souls.
How do I awaken myself and my fellow Americans to seek and find the one who will fill our lives and feed our needs?
Don Williams "Good Ole Boys like me
Jackson Browne, "Lives in the Balance
“A prison cell, in which one waits, hopes - and is completely dependent on the fact that the door of freedom has to be opened from the outside, is not a bad picture of Advent”
Why must he then,
be faithfully nonconformant?
To believe then,
is to come to then, to know.
When they believed,
did they then conform?
Was it in the beginning,
or in the end?
Speaking of the Cowboy Jesus.
May a man have a vision of the one,
then standing next to a urinal,
in a stall at his wife's baptism?
May Christ reveal himself, to us,
in this manner?
What if the Cowboy Jesus would come riding a horse,
in his cowboy suit, consuming Camel Cigarettes?
Would we then turn him, away?
What if God disobeyed The Word of Wisdom.
Peter partook of the forbidden animals,
and converted the gentiles.
He is now a member of the Christian community,
because Peter broke his version,
of the Word of Wisdom.
Peter then faithfully nonconformed.
Once in Vicksburg, He met the one,
who dying of cancer, received a vision,
From the other, who was testifying to the truthfulness,
of the Book of Mormon, and the restoration,
while consuming Camel Cigarettes.
To break a rule is to be disobedient.
Disobedience is not faithful nonconformity.
Lucifer rebelled and desired his own will.
Eve disobeyed, to conform to God's will.
Truly it is the rule-breakers,
who disrupt the status quo,
and create a place, for growth.
Gethsemane had always been plan A,
not a contingency, not plan B,
but plan A.
He and the Father had studied it,
and discussed it and approved it.
This is the plan then,
how to rescue the new,
creations.
The first had rebelled,
had been cast out,
before their bodies,
they had received.
Their choice than to follow,
Lucifer, The Son of the Morning.
The Heavens mourned their loss,
at his rebellion.
To know a thing,
is not to understand a thing.
This then, he had come, to see.
This thing he must now, experience,
to better understand,
to better become their advocate,
with the Father.
This then-new experience,
is like, the experience,
of new Fatherhood.
One can study and understand,
the process, but to receive, then a child,
and then to raise a child,
this, then offers a new level, of understanding.
What then does he now, understand,
on the morning after, Gethsemane.
The Father had separated himself, not
than ever, from the Son.
This, then new experience,
This, then new death,
this we label, Spiritual Death.
Spiritual Death, requires separation,
from the Father.
The Son had never sinned,
had never chosen, his ways,
over his father’s ways.
Or to say again,
the Father's ways were always,
his ways.
These ways, then,
one and the same,
were they, always?
The Father and Son,
always, of one mind,
and one will.
How then does the Father,
separate himself,
from the Son?
To what corner of the Universe?
Can he then depart?
To then separate,
and no longer be one,
with the Son.
That the Son may now experience,
Spiritual Death?
To better advocate for,
their new Creations.
To redeem now, their new, Creations.
This thing, then he learned,
then, here this day.
This pain of Spiritual Death,
of this separation from the Father,
of guilt and shame,
over choices made.
Freedom, or free will,
would always require,
the possibility of then choice,
other than the Father's choice.
This then we label,
the Fathers will.
With these choices, by the new creation,
they would then learn to be more,
like the Father and the Son.
This then to learn to rejoice,
or regret the consequences of,
these new choices.
Turning back towards the Father,
they would then, learn,
to resubmit their will,
to the Fathers will,
their ways becoming, anew,
the Father's ways, again.
This then always learning,
that the Father's choices would then become,
their choices, the remainder of the Eternities.
The Son now understanding their choice,
from his experiences, on Earth, and in the Garden.
This then-new knowledge and experience,
and then to take upon himself,
the full price, and penalty of sin,
or separation from God The Father.
He then more fully becoming, for them,
their advocate with the Father.
Let's make a baby, she said,
there on her waterbed.
This, then, installed last week,
when her things, they moved in.
She was the first,
and would remain, the one only,
to make such a request.
Her Dad had feared,
the roof would collapse,
on the family home,
when her trousseau,
She, removed.
Contained within,
all ingredients needed,
to create a family,
less one husband.
Thirty years, she waited,
for this day.
It was not the first night,
but second.
The first night,
a pajama night,
had been.
The temple wedding,
the reception, in Franklin,
with family, and friends.
These had taken,
all her energy,
that first night.
That morning, he spent,
crying in the bathroom,
in the apartment.
Left him early, that morn, she did
from, the family breakfast,
with her best friend.
The meal offered,
on this day, by the landlady,
In this, their new home,
Early, she was needed
to begin the preparations
for the day's events at the temple.
She thought she was offering a kindness,
He thought, she preferred, her best friend.
This gift she offered him,
more time with his family.
The ones not permitted to attend,
the wedding.
Then were the smells,
In the morning,
of the third day.
they awoke early,
to prepare for this
their new life,
together.
No time for a honeymoon.
That would never come.
He was needed,
at the repair shop.
She, a home,
to organize.
Coming home that night,
the apartment clean
a fridge with food,
dinner on the table,
and clean laundry.
These things,
his mom,
did not ...
these then, new smells,
then did surprise him,
that morn'.
Like the smell,
of the ice cream bucket,
in their friend's truck,
containing the nauseous, contents
of a night's dinner.
The one held to celebrate,
the arrival of the couples,
first child, that next spring.
the smell of new love,
and stale sex.
like two moose,
rutting in the woods,
bringing new life, to the world.
or two socks,
sitting in the bottom,
of the hamper,
waiting to be renewed,
at next week's laundry.
The gentle nibbling,
on her ear, as they sought,
to start, that new life,
together.
These are the smells,
that surprised him,
that second morning.
The large righteous, posterity,
God had promised him.
Create not together,
they would.
These babies would come,
from one, who loved, them all.
This, new source
a handmaiden, she would be.
In the Torah, a handmaiden,
is the one, to supply a new life,
when no life, create, the couple,
together.
Hagar, Ruth, and Mary,
such handmaidens,
had been to God
and the family.
In time, her sister,
then one, would be.
Still the smells, the next morn',
he would forget not.
The life, this then, they nurture,
together, this day.
This is version 2.0
Had she then ministered to him?
The one, who was sent,
By the one who loved them all?
Such difficulty, there had always been.
Between him and the one who created him.
This the one, who created him second.
The first creator he has no memory of,
the one in the divine nursery.
She the first, sought to ease, the difficulty.
between the second creator and her son.
Once long ago, lost had been another,
In the act of creation.
All of his life he had heard the story,
of the one who died young taking her final creation,
with her into the Eternities.
She then leaving behind her first six creations.
This then for the father to raise,
in the middle of a depression.
This then was his great-grandmother,
his mothers, mothers, mother.
Did his grandmother then return to minister to them,
to heal the void, between them now?
At the request, of the Eternal Mother,
The one from the divine Nursery?
His mom so young had she been,
when created him, she.
So young and inexperienced,
tobe then she was, still learning.
This angel, then sent, to minister,
his mothers, mothers, mother.
To heal the void, between them two.
This is the thought that then comes to him,
as he fears the loss of the grandmothers,
from the bitterness, and failure to forgive his mother,
for the mother she has ceased to be.
So, he knows now then, the angel sent to minister,
To bind up the wounds and seal the void,
between them now.
Lauretta West Byington
5 June 1893- 7 May 1924
I thank God, whom I serve, as my ancestors did, with a clear
conscience, as night and day I constantly remember you in my prayers. Recalling your tears, I long to see you, so
that I may be filled with joy. I am
reminded of your sincere faith, which first lived in your grandmother Lois and
in your mother Eunice and, I am persuaded, now lives in you also. (2 Timothy 1:3-5 (NIV))
He sent angels, divine messengers, to bless His children,
reassure them that heaven was always very close and that His help was always
very near. (Jeffrey R. Holland October
Conference 2008)
The Lord builds up Jerusalem;
He gathers together the outcasts of Israel.
He heals the brokenhearted
And binds up their wounds. (Psalm 147:2-3)
"With malice toward none with charity for all with firmness in the right as God gives us to see the right let us strive on to finish the work we are in to bind up the nation's wounds, to care for him who shall have borne the battle and for his widow and his orphan ~ to do all which may achieve and cherish a just and lasting peace among ourselves and with all nations." Lincoln's Second Inaugural Address
In the last few months, I have been reading and searching the scripture to understand the powers my wife and sister share with their Heavenly Mother. I remember when the children were babies and my wife would pray over them as she placed them in a cool basin of water when they were ill or teething. My wife can serve a mission and serve in the temple without formal ordination. These are things I could not do. A few months ago I wrote this essay on some of my conclusions.
I have learned to know and to appreciate how my wife is a prophetess and how the powers She shares with her Heavenly Mother bless our family.
Does the fact that a man is a racist slave-holding person preclude him from being a righteous god-fearing man seeking to redeem Zion.
In the United States today there are men and women forming mobs
and tearing down statues. Most of these
statues are of men who at some point in their lives owned slaves. Among these
statues are men who lived and died seeking to create the world we now inhabit. Men
like Thomas Jefferson, and Francis Scott Key, and Ulysses Grant. Grant by the
way emancipated his one slave before emancipation was an acceptable thing
and this caused him trouble with his in-laws.
For a long time, there has been a need to recognize and come
to terms with our racist heritage. Many of my personal heroes have a racist
past. Let me tell you about one racist slaveholder from my past.
This man was a Methodist preacher who turned to full-time missionary
work when his wife died and left him with two young children. He left his
children with his best friend's wife and went on preaching circuits spreading
the Methodist faith with no purse or script.
He later discovered and helped promote a major American Religion.
He served two missions to England and was responsible for bringing tens of thousands
of English converts to America to strengthen this society. He led tens of thousands
of religious refugees from the United States to form a new society in the Great
Basin of the then Mexican Territory.
After he founded this territory, he worked to create slave
laws protecting the right to own slaves in this territory. As a trustee for
this faith, for a short time, he became the owner of at least one slave. As a religious
and civil leader, he worked to hold the United States Army in central Wyoming, for
a winter, to further his political and religious agenda.
He worked for and actively pursued a policy that prevented
negro men and women from holding priesthood office in that faith. That policy continued for nearly 130 years.
Knowing his racist past would you join a mob to tear down his
statue?
Occasionally the people we know, and love does things that we do not approve of. My relationship with my mother was troubling and always a dance. She made
many mistakes as she learned to be a better mom. It is only after I became a father that I learned to understand some of the choices she made. Because my mom made many mistakes and did many
things to harm her children in the process of learning to be a mom should I
then take all of her pictures and burn them?
I think we need to use the same hindsight with our leaders and
their racist past that I have used to understand my mother’s choices and
mistakes. I have learned from her
mistakes. I am learning to avoid the errors in parenting that she committed.
This racist Methodist preaching I am speaking about is
Brigham Young, who as trustee in trust for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day
Saints did hold title to at least one slave. This slave had been donated to the
church by one of the Mississippi Saints who donated it in partial payment of
their tithing. Green Flake was one of the
vanguard 144 pioneers who first arrived in the great basin area of the future
Utah Territory in 1847. During the winter of 1857, Brigham Young did capture and hold the United States Army in the Fort
Bridger area of the Wyoming Territory while he sought a negotiated settlement
between the Mormon Church and the United States Government.
1. The sons of Kohath were given the assignment to watch over and protect the Tabernacle Numbers 4:15
I woke this morning in a room where my Momma’s last three children were conceived. This room has been many things in the previous 45 years. It was a bedroom, a tv room, a hospital room, and finally a prison. My Momma spent her final years here confined to an oversized, overstuffed chair.
Nothing can separate us from the love of God. Exodus 32:30-34
While Moses was on the mount the people create a golden calf and sinned against the Lord. Moses loved the people, so he sought to intervene with the Lord on their behalf as a redeemer type as Christ serves as our redeemer. God did not wash the sin of the people away but sought to turn them back his way again. No matter how much we sin God will work for us to bring us redemption. We must be careful that we do not sin beyond the point where we no longer seek redemption as the people under Mormon and Nephi no longer sought redemption.
Have you ever saught to be a redeemer like Moses. Would you like to help redeem a brother and sister by both being a good example and by teaching and sharing what you know?
Moses 1
8 And it came to pass that Moses looked, and beheld the aworld upon which he was created; and Moses bbeheld the world and the ends thereof, and all the children of men which are, and which were created; of the same he greatly cmarveled and wondered.
10 And it came to pass that it was for the space of many hours before Moses did again receive his natural astrength like unto man; and he said unto himself: Now, for this cause I know that bman is cnothing, which thing I never had supposed.
What is this then what Moses sees on Mt Sinai? Why does supposed man is nothing?
But man is not nothing. Man is God's Child. Man is god in embryo. I and God are the same species. A sperm and an egg come together to create a Zygote. This Zygote is the same species as God. It is god in embryo.
My mom informed me that she knew I was coming at my conception. She has a memory of where she was when she and Dad created me. For years I thought that was gross. I really did not want to hear that from my mom. No child wants to think about his parents creating life. Now I wonder if God shared that secret with my mom. Was I that special to God? Maybe it was my Eternal Mother who shared that information with my mom, not my Eternal Father. She had spent eons with me in the Eternal Nursery and now she was sending me to Earth and she wanted my Earthly Mother to share in the joy of my creation.
1)
Genesis 26:4 God promised Abraham a great
posterity through his son Isaac.
a) I have been given the same promise in my patriarchal blessing. I was blessed with a large righteous posterity. At the time of the blessing, I was unaware that I was personally infertile. I am sure God was aware of my infertility. I have often asked myself what God sees as my posterity. When I was courting my wife, she informed me of her possible infertility. I told her that her possible infertility had no bearing on my choice to marry her. We would work out those details after we married. When we discovered my infertility, we chose to find joy in raising nieces and nephews while we waited for our children to come. This brought much happiness into our relationship. I have since learned my posterity includes all of those I have led to Christ. Thankfully we have adopted two beautiful children and helped her mom to raise two additional grandchildren.
What is in posterity, how
do I define my posterity?
If posterity are the children of the body? Why did God
promise in my Patriarchal Blessing a large righteous posterity if he knew I was
not able to create sperm cells? Posterity for me must be something besides
children of the body.
My wife and I have adopted two children and we are expecting
our first grandchild in the spring. We almost had a grandchild when my daughter
was in her teenage years. She miscarried before I was informed of its conception.
Was this my posterity?
If we had not adopted children, who then would my
large righteous posterity be? The nieces and nephew my wife and I found such joy in helping to raise?
Since my early teens, my greatest desire has been to lead my family to live
more moral lives. They have led more moral lives and they are making better
choices, are they then this large righteous posterity?
I often feel a tremendous sense of guilt, shame, and loss
because I have not served in formal church leadership roles since the beginning
of our marriage. I have wondered if the Lord trusts me to lead his formal church. I
have discovered what a blessing this has been in my life and the life of those
I serve. This has left me with time to lead those who will never see the inside
of a church. I am loved and admire by this group. I have led many of them to live
more moral lives. Are they then my posterity?
I developed a talent for poetry when my wife was dying of
cancer. If not for the cancer treatments
I would never have attempted poetry.
Will the poetry be my legacy and posterity?
These all be partial answers to the question of posterity.
