“Out of the quarrel with others we make rhetoric; out of the quarrel with ourselves we make poetry.” ― William Butler Yeats
Friday, January 15, 2016
Wednesday, January 13, 2016
On why God weeps
... For Mormons, it is God’s freely made choice to inaugurate and sustain costly loving relationships that is at the very core of his divine identity."
Givens, Terryl L. (2014-10-03). Wrestling the Angel: The Foundations of Mormon Thought: Cosmos, God, Humanity (p. 88). Oxford University Press. Kindle Edition.
Tuesday, January 5, 2016
To preserve our future...
Hugh B. Brown as a young soldier in the Canadian forces. |
Just one word: No matter what your past has been, you have a spotless future.
A week ago tomorrow night I was talking to the young people at Brigham Young University in a fireside. There were 12,500 of them present. A very inspirational time was had. I spoke to them about some of the things that have been spoken of here tonight. I told them they have a spotless future, and asked that they guard that future and remember that when the Judge shall summon them, he will not look them over for medals, for diplomas, for honors, but for scars, and I warned them to beware that there be no stains between the scars.
God help us to be worthy of the responsibility that is ours, both those who are missionaries, and those who have been on missions previously, those of us who are growing old in the work; let us continue faithfully to serve God and keep his commandments. Let us remember what the speakers tonight have said to us, and take their words home with us and put them into practice.
(Hugh B. Brown:The Improvement, December 1969)
Tuesday, December 29, 2015
On her Death
To luv...a choice?!
This pain then it brings,
To me it does now.
Thursday, October 29, 2015
ON Mommas’ Afghan.
Momma loved to knit afghan’s. They helped her to pass the time when she was watching television. Her Momma taught her how to crochet as a young child. I can remember many hours watching her crochet. She had crocheted so long she no longer watched her stitching, it was a mechanical motion more like walking or chewing gum. I wonder if it helped her to think.
Momma decided each of her children needed a good heavy afghan. She had collected many small balls of yarn from previous project’s The afghan’s were heavy. They had a heavy double stitch, one color on each side. The afghan were so heavy they were best used in the winter.
Each afghan required a year to complete. She worked on those afghans for four years. Each year one of her children received an afghan for Christmas. I wonder if she thought about her children as she was knitting each one of them their afghan. One child could not read well and had difficulty in school. He was color blind and had trouble telling his colors apart. One children read well but had difficulty speaking to people his own age. He never dated much, but was fortunate to find a good woman who understood him. One child never ate enough and had to be reminded when it was time to eat. This child still struggles with her weight and is now developing M.S. One child struggled with her first marriage and lived with Mom for a couple years. Mom helped her to raise her sons until a man came along who loved her boys and adopted them as his own. They now have five more children and how do they keep her busy.
Momma married young and grew up with her children. Her husband was a challenge. Signs of high functioning Autism and hyperactivity are present in the male line of his family. Momma would never have understood these words she just knew Dad had a tough time filtering his thoughts. He spoke out in inappropriate times and in inappropriate places. My Dad and his Father were forbidden to be in the Smith Brother Lumber Company together. One of them at a time was more then a handful.
Each fall my wife pulls the afghan out of the closet and puts is on our bed. I love to fell warm and comforted by it’s weight.
The afghan reminds of my mother and her life. The afghan is no longer perfect like it was when my mother gave it to me. A few years ago I snagged it on a piece of furniture. Their is a small stitch torn out of one side. My mamma's life was like this afghan. It was no loner perfect like it had been when her Momma gave life to her. Even though this afghan is no longer perfect it is still functional and fulfills its purpose. I have ask my wife to repair the snagged. My wife is skilled in the art of crochet. She tells me it is not possible to repair the snag. Even if she did repair the afghan it would no longer be the afghan my mother crocheted. As the year go by I learn to appreciate the afghan for it beauty and its flaw. It becomes more real with time like Margery Williams Velveteen rabbit (see. The Velveteen Rabbit or How Toys Become Real )
Mamma is gone, but the is the afghan remains. My Mom, like her quilt became more real with time. She was deeply flawed. She loved her children and she loved her husband. She always tried her best and luved her family.
With time I have the shed the bitterness and enmity. I am warmed by the afghan and the memories it brings.
If you have the opportunity to live and love, to forgive and to forget, please do. And leave some memories and if possible something that is real like Mommas afghan.
a repost from oct 21 2011.
still true and I still sleep with every night.
From October 21 2011
Originally posted to facebook.com
Tuesday, February 24, 2015
On life or is it death.
Monday, January 19, 2015
No more, to mourn
Revealed not still,
No more, to mourn
Tuesday, January 13, 2015
on choosing to rise and not to set.
still together they are
T'is twilight
is it ris'in'
or (their,there) setting.
The choice thyr'in ...
to choose to rise,
and not to set.
the fire and warmth.
or cold and bitter; no more to share.
01-13-2015
Friday, November 21, 2014
My Testimony
- I deeply believe in the prophet Joseph Smith and in his mission to restore the Church.
- I believe the church is in a constant state of restoration.
- I believe God has other prophets too.
- John Milton was his prophet to the English people, as were William Tyndale and John Wycliffe.
- True religion lies somewhere between the faith of Thomas More and the prophetic voice of William Tyndale.
- The church was taken not from the earth at the death of the apostles but was received into the wilderness where she was nourished by his poets and musicians. (see Revelations 12:6)
Tuesday, October 21, 2014
On an ever expanding Hell...
“The Great Divorce”, is a fable, told by C.S. Lewis. In the story a choice is made, to stay in Perdition and make it a Hell or take a bus ride and start a journey to Heaven.
The second is a great meadow, leading to Heaven. At this meadow friends and family greet the new comers and urge them to take the path to heaven.
One of the interesting facets of Hell/Purgatory is the ever expanding city, dark gray and dingy.
Saturday, September 27, 2014
Read then of faith; That shone above the fagot,
Read, Sweet, How Others Strove
Individuals paid a heavy price to strengthen the church and greater Kingdom of God
fag·ot
an·neal
verb past tense: annealed; past participle: annealedheat (metal or glass) and allow it to cool slowly, in order to remove internal stresses and toughen it.
Biochemistry
recombine (DNA) in the double-stranded form following separation by heat.
Friday, September 19, 2014
O' hear the cry of the uncleav'd womb
Thursday, September 18, 2014
on the dictatorship and absolutism of scientific thought
Givens, Terryl; Givens, Fiona (2014-09-05). The Crucible of Doubt (Kindle Locations 322-328). Deseret Book Company. Kindle Edition.
Monday, September 15, 2014
On Mothers' Eve.
God the Son informing Eve of the consequences of her choice to eat the forbidden fruit and learn good from evil.
In gaining the knowledge of procreation, she will learn by experience how to be a god and govern her children, this act will increase her sorrow.
Wednesday, September 10, 2014
A new take on Pascal's Wager
George MacDonald with son Ronald (right) and daughter Mary (left) in 1864. Photograph by Lewis Carroll. |
"Whatever energies I may or may not have,
Friday, September 5, 2014
On Male equality and Female ordination.
on becoming, how our sorrows drive us to the house of prayer
"Gladness may make a man forget his thanksgiving; misery drives him to his prayers. For we are not yet, we are only becoming. ...there are two door-keepers to the house of prayer, and Sorrow is more on the alert to open than her grandson Joy"
"If a wife so love that she would keep every opposition, every inconsistency in her husband's as yet but partially harmonious character, she does not love well enough for the kingdom of heaven. If its imperfections be essential to the individuality she loves, and to the repossession of her joy in it, she may be sure that, if he were restored to her as she would have him, she would soon come to love him less--perhaps to love him not at all;" ...
... "Neither is it any man's peculiarities that make him beloved; it is the essential humanity underlying those peculiarities."
Friday, June 20, 2014
On Living with Autism, and keeping a Covenant.
This is the covenant my wife and mother have kept.
Living with one with autism can be a burden even when my mother had no name for it and did not understand it.
TAMMY WYNETTE LYRICS
"Stand By Your Man"
Sometimes it's hard to be a woman
Giving all your love to just one man
You'll have bad times, and he'll have good times
Doin' things that you don't understand
But if you love him, you'll forgive him
Even though he's hard to understand
And if you love him, oh be proud of him
'Cause after all he's just a man.
Stand by your man, give him two arms to cling to
And something warm to come to
When nights are cold and lonely.
Stand by your man, and show the world you love him
Keep giving all the love you can.
Stand by your man.
Stand by your man, and show the world you love him
Keep giving all the love you can.
Stand by your man.
SONGWRITERS
BILLY SHERRILL;TAMMY WYNETTE
PUBLISHED BY
EMI AL GALLICO MUSIC CORP.
Monday, June 16, 2014
On the inheritance, Male and Female
The man went alone to the vault. His first key opened the door. He tried to unlock the treasure with the other key, but he could not, for there were two locks on the safe. His key alone would not open it. No matter how he tried, he could not open it. He was puzzled. He had been given the keys. He knew the treasure was rightfully his. He had obeyed instructions, but he could not open the safe.
In due time, there came a woman into the vault. She, too, held a key. It was noticeably different from the key he held. Her key fit the other lock. It humbled him to learn that he could not obtain his rightful inheritance without her.
They made a covenant that together they would open the treasure and, as instructed, he would watch over the vault and protect it; she would watch over the treasure. She was not concerned that, as guardian of the vault, he held two keys, for his full purpose was to see that she was safe as she watched over that which was most precious to them both. Together they opened the safe and partook of their inheritance. They rejoiced for, as promised, it replenished itself.
BOYD K. PACKER General Conference October 1993
Monday, June 9, 2014
On cheap grace.
"Cheap grace is preaching forgiveness without requiring repentance, baptism without church discipline, Communion without confession. … Cheap grace is grace without discipleship, grace without the cross, grace without Jesus Christ, living and incarnate."
"costly grace confronts us as a gracious call to follow Jesus, it comes as a word of forgiveness to the broken spirit and the contrite heart. It is costly because it compels a man to submit to the yoke of Christ and follow him; it is grace because Jesus says: "My yoke is easy and my burden is light."
Dietrich Bonhoeffer
Sunday, June 8, 2014
On Gloria's touch.
How I met Gloria
I first met Gloria in the fall of 1985, in Vicksburg Mississippi. I was in the Louisiana-Mississippi area teaching people about the restored Church of Christ and helping them to become members of the Church of Jesus Christ Latter-Day Saints.
My Mom and I entered an a covenant that if I prepared myself to serve she would find a way to support me. This was a big commitment on her part. We where not a wealthy family. My Mom believed in the teaching's of the church. She had not attended services for a number of years, at least 10.
Our church has a lay Priesthood and all worthy men in our church receive the same authority. I was ordained by my bishop because my Father, who holds the same authority, had stopped attending church. My Father had ordained me to the two previous steps in the priesthood, Deacon and Teacher. If my father had been attending church he would have ordained me to next 2 steps in the priesthood, Priest and Elder. I was ordained to my final step in the priesthood, Elder, by my beloved uncle, Deloye Grand Herzog, when I turned 18.
Gloria life and death started me an exploration.
We have a Priesthood Ordinance. It is a blessing with Olive Oil and sealing with the Priesthood. I participated in offering this ordinance to Gloria. I did want to be seen as a faith healer.
- I wanted to see Gloria enter the covenant of Baptism
- I did not want her to join to save her life.
- Gloria helped me to understand that God works in many wonderful ways. He uses all children to bless each other. We are his hands on Earth.
- God used my parents, who did not attend church to support me on a mission
- God used a member of our church who did attend services to help Gloria gain a testimony of Christ.
We may not see the many hidden hands and ways God uses to bless his children.
"... it is quite possible that God’s purpose is something different from the purpose of either party; and yet the human instrumentalities, working just as they do, are of the best adaptation to effect his purpose."
Friday, June 6, 2014
On Parenting and Fatherhood.
I now parent my Father,
I hope I am kind enough to my children that they will select a good care facility when my time comes.
Where my Father and I's journey will take us I cannot see now. I can only take one step into the darkness and hope wife and children will follow.
I have know for decades that my children need to see me honor my parents.
I need to honor my children, they are my legacy.
"And the cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon
Little boy blue and the man on the moon"
"And as I hung up the phone it occurred to me
He'd grown up just like me
My boy was just like me"
(Harry Chapin)
Tuesday, June 3, 2014
On The Flavor of Lipstick
Tuesday, April 1, 2014
for he shall save his people from their sins
And She
"shalt call his name Jesus;
for he shall save his people
from their sins."Matthew 1:21
"I would help some to understand
what Jesus came from the home of our Father to be to us
and do for us."
"The causes of their discomfort are of all kinds,"
himself,
the cause of every man's discomfort is evil,
moral evil
first of all,
evil in himself,
his own sin,
his own wrongness,
his own unrightness;
and then,
"the only way to get rid of it,
is for the man to get rid of his own sin."
"but evil in ourselves is the cause of its continuance,
the source of its necessity,"
"Foolish is the man,
and there are many such men,
who would rid himself or his fellows of discomfort
by setting the world right,
by waging war on the evils around him,
while he neglects that integral part
of the world where lies his business,
his first business namely, his own
character and conduct.
Were it possible"...
"that the world should
thus be righted from the outside,
it would yet be impossible for the man
who had contributed to the work,
remaining what he was,
ever to enjoy the perfection
of the result;
himself not in tune with the organ he had tuned,
he must imagine it still
The philanthropist who regards the wrong as in the race,
forgetting that the race is made up of conscious and wrong individuals,
forgets also that wrong is always generated
in and done by an individual;
Monday, March 17, 2014
5 Kinds of Mormon
Friday, March 14, 2014
Robert Kirby "On Staying Mormon"
By Robert Kirby
Salt Lake Tribune Columnist
First Published Mar 13 2014
Shortly before leaving for my LDS mission in 1973, a coworker tried to get me to see the light by giving me the bloody details of the Mountain Meadows Massacre.
In 1857 immigrants traveling in a wagon train were slaughtered near Cedar City. The actual perpetrators of the massacre had long been debated but the truth was finally coming out. Jordan was extra happy about that.
Jordan: "And it was the Mormons who killed them."
Me: "Yeah, I know. Two of my great-great-grandfathers helped."
The fact that I already knew what had happened and was related to some of the murderers didn’t sit well with Jordan. How could I possibly still go on a mission knowing that stuff about the church?
That part was easy: It had nothing to do with me.
While troubling, Mountain Meadows didn’t surprise me. I already knew a few Mormons so steeped in church obedience that with the right prompting they’d probably do it again. As I saw it, my whole job was to make sure I wasn’t one of them.
I feel the same way about polygamy, the one-time ban on blacks in the priesthood and a bunch of other troublesome stuff in our past. I’ve always believed people are bad, including (and sometimes especially) people who are trying to be good.
I bring this up because in a recent address to a group of historian President Dieter F. Uchtdorf, second counselor in the LDS First Presidency, encouraged Mormons to maintain hope in the face of troubling explanations.
When The Tribune reported on it I started getting feedback from readers eager to prove to me that the church I attend isn’t "true." Our history proves it.
Email: "The shame alone should tell you what you need to do, Mr. Kirby. Get out now."
Me: "OK, let me think ab...no."
I’m Mormon. It’s who I am. Yeah, there are things I don’t like about my church but there are things that I do.
It helps that I’m comfortable being my kind of Mormon. It helps me handle people who think they have a better idea what I should do than me.
When I read the story about Uchtdorf’s remarks, my first thought was who better than him to give such advice?
Uchtdorf belongs to a group of people with a dark and horrible past. And it isn’t Mormons. He’s German. He’s probably spent his entire life hearing about the Holocaust, genocide on an industrial scale.
So even though he’s now a naturalized U.S. citizen, I wonder why he didn’t renounce his German heritage? He doesn’t have to be German.
More to the point, why would a guy descended from such horribleness actually volunteer to serve in the Bundeswehr (post-war German army)?
Even though we belong to same church, Uchtdorf and I don’t exactly travel in the same circles, so I have to guess about this. I’d guess he’s proud to be German and have served as a fighter pilot in the West German Air Force.
Should he hang his head in shame? Or does he tell himself — rightly so — that what Germans did a long time ago doesn’t change the kind of person he is today. Maybe sticking around was the best thing for him to do.
Makes sense to me. I don’t want to be something else. I’m comfortable being where I am.
That doesn’t sit well with people both in the church and out who arrogantly presume to tell me what I should do. Fortunately for me, the answer is the same for both groups. All else aside, I’d probably stay Mormon just to piss you off.
Robert Kirby can be reached at rkirby@sltrib.com or facebook.com/stillnotpatbagley.
Wednesday, March 12, 2014
On gaining a friendship
Kelly J. Niederhauser |
Elder Niederhauser and Nancy Hoffman Hing |
Sunday, March 2, 2014
On the Sauls in our lives
My Thoughts on being Paul; first some background.
It seams in restoring his church God, ( THE LORD, Jehovah, YHWH) has in the past used a dual track process, using formal leaders and informal leaders.
Question, Why;
First the formal Leadership
The Calling of the Twelve.
'And I tell you that you are Peter, and on this rock I will build my church, and the gates of Hades will not overcome it. I will give you the keys of the kingdom of heaven; whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven.’ (Matthew 16:17-19,NIV)
The Seventy-Two
'After this the Lord appointed seventy-two others and sent them two by two ahead of him to every town and place where he was about to go. He told them, ‘The harvest is plentiful, but the workers are few. Ask the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into his harvest field. Go! I am sending you out like lambs among wolves. Do not take a purse or bag or sandals; and do not greet anyone on the road.
....
‘When you enter a town and are welcomed, eat what is offered to you. Heal those there who are ill and tell them, “The kingdom of God has come near to you.”' (Luke 10:1-9, NIV)
Second the Informal Leadership. (Saul/Paul, Mary Magdalene, Cornelius;gentile and Roman Centurion,
He born, Saul, a strict Jew of the Pharisee
"circumcised on the eighth day, of the people of Israel, of the tribe of Benjamin, a Hebrew of Hebrews; in regard to the law, a Pharisee;" (Philippians 3:5,NIV)
and Paul a Roman Citizen.
"As they stretched him out to flog him, Paul said to the centurion standing there, “Is it legal for you to flog a Roman citizen who hasn’t even been found guilty?”
When the centurion heard this, he went to the commander and reported it. “What are you going to do?” he asked. “This man is a Roman citizen.”
The commander went to Paul and asked, “Tell me, are you a Roman citizen?”
“Yes, I am,” he answered.
Then the commander said, “I had to pay a lot of money for my citizenship.”
“But I was born a citizen,” Paul replied" Acts 22:25-28 (NIV)
He born with dual names and dual citizenship.
He studied under Rabban Gamaliel,
"Rabban Gamaliel was a leading authority in the Sanhedrin in the early-1st century CE." (Wikipedia:HTTP://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gamaliel )
In his zeal to promote the Jewish Kingdom he persecuted the Christian Sect.
But Saul began to destroy the church. Going from house to house, he dragged off both men and women and put them in prison." (Act 7:55-5;Acts 8:2,NIV)
He was present at the stoneing of Stephen
"But Stephen, full of the Holy Spirit, looked up to heaven and saw the glory of God, and Jesus standing at the right hand of God. ‘Look,’ he said, ‘I see heaven open and the Son of Man standing at the right hand of God.’ (Act 22:3-5, NIV)
Saul/Paul's conversion
‘Who are you, Lord?’ Saul asked.
‘I am Jesus, whom you are persecuting,’ he replied. ‘Now get up and go into the city, and you will be told what you must do.’ (Acts 9:1-19 NIV)
Mary Magdalene and Mary the mother of James, and Salome
But when they looked up, they saw that the stone, which was very large, had been rolled away. As they entered the tomb, they saw a young man dressed in a white robe sitting on the right side, and they were alarmed.
‘Don’t be alarmed,’ he said. ‘You are looking for Jesus the Nazarene, who was crucified. He has risen! He is not here. See the place where they laid him. But go, tell his disciples and Peter, “He is going ahead of you into Galilee. There you will see him, just as he told you.”’ (Mark 16:1-8,NIV)
My question is;
I see a pattern here of Christ appearing both to the appointed leaders of his church and to persons outside the traditional leadership of the Church,
Why.
I believe Jesus called Twelve and Seventy-two men to preach his gospel to the world, lead his church.
These men were called to preach his gospel and administer the ordinances of the church.
The risen Lord first appeared to two woman at the tomb, not to the Twelve or the Seventy-two.
Leadership blinded by the traditions of their training.
“When Jesus rose early on the first day of the week, he appeared first to Mary Magdalene, out of whom he had driven seven demons. She went and told those who had been with him and who were mourning and weeping. When they heard that Jesus was alive and that she had seen him, they did not believe it.
After-wards Jesus appeared in a different form to two of them while they were walking in the country. These returned and reported it to the rest; but they did not believe them either.
Later Jesus appeared to the Eleven as they were eating; he rebuked them for their lack of faith and their stubborn refusal to believe those who had seen him after he had risen.” (Mark 16:9-14, NIV)
Cornelius calls for Peter
"At Caesarea there was a man named Cornelius, a centurion in what was known as the Italian Regiment. He and all his family were devout and God-fearing; he gave generously to those in need and prayed to God regularly. One day at about three in the afternoon he had a vision. He distinctly saw an angel of God, who came to him and said, ‘Cornelius!’
Cornelius stared at him in fear. ‘What is it, Lord?’ he asked.
The angel answered, ‘Your prayers and gifts to the poor have come up as a memorial offering before God. Now send men to Joppa to bring back a man named Simon who is called Peter. He is staying with Simon the tanner, whose house is by the sea.’
When the angel who spoke to him had gone, Cornelius called two of his servants and a devout soldier who was one of his attendants. He told them everything that had happened and sent them to Joppa.”
Peter’s vision
“About noon the following day as they were on their journey and approaching the city, Peter went up on the roof to pray. He became hungry and wanted something to eat, and while the meal was being prepared, he fell into a trance. He saw heaven opened and something like a large sheet being let down to earth by its four corners. It contained all kinds of four-footed animals, as well as reptiles and birds. Then a voice told him, ‘Get up, Peter. Kill and eat.’
‘Surely not, Lord!’ Peter replied. ‘I have never eaten anything impure or unclean.’
The voice spoke to him a second time, ‘Do not call anything impure that God has made clean.’
This happened three times, and immediately the sheet was taken back to heaven.
While Peter was wondering about the meaning of the vision, the men sent by Cornelius found out where Simone's house was and stopped at the gate. They called out, asking if Simon who was known as Peter was staying there.
While Peter was still thinking about the vision, the Spirit said to him, ‘Simon, three men are looking for you. So get up and go downstairs. Do not hesitate to go with them, for I have sent them.’
Peter went down and said to the men, ‘I’m the one you’re looking for. Why have you come?’
The men replied, ‘We have come from Cornelius the centurion. He is a righteous and God-fearing man, who is respected by all the Jewish people. A holy angel told him to ask you to come to his house so that he could hear what you have to say.’ Then Peter invited the men into the house to be his guests.
......
Then Peter began to speak: ‘I now realise how true it is that God does not show favoritism but accepts from every nation the one who fears him and does what is right. You know the message God sent to the people of Israel, announcing the good news of peace through Jesus Christ, who is Lord of all. You know what has happened throughout the province of Judea, beginning in Galilee after the baptism that John preached – how God anointed Jesus of Nazareth with the Holy Spirit and power, and how he went around doing good and healing all who were under the power of the devil, because God was with him." (Acts 10:1-38,NIV)
Gadfield Elm Chapel England; post-restoration |